Snakes without ladders

Our neighbour Fleur knocks on our door trembling and I go to jelly. Her brother has been gravely ill, I fear the worst. She holds up her phone and cries “Sssnake!” We examine the picture and agree that it is indeed a snake in the bottom of her garden water feature. Pulling on a pair of sturdy gardening gloves, the three of us tromp off to assess the situation. Thankfully, the snake isn’t moving and with hunks of skin hanging off appears to be long dead, we’re assuming that it found its way into the pond but couldn’t get back … Continue reading Snakes without ladders

Old stuff

I’m walking through a museum following a group of tourists and our knowledgeable guide when suddenly there’s a hell of a racket outside. A couple of local kids are skateboarding in the courtyard. The old guide leaves us standing as he takes off at a gallop loudly shouting “Piss Off!” I get the feeling that those kids get a real kick out of baiting the poor old bugger. Hang on, he’s not that old he’s my age. Where are those bloody kids? Continue reading Old stuff

Heaven’s, she’s gone screwy

Sep 2019, Mulambin, Qld We’re happily camped in Mulambin on the Capricorn Coast having failed in our attempt to get to Darwin. For a second option this place is warm, relaxed and pretty good. There are a bunch of us here and even Toothless and his missus Madam Secretary have rocked up after having made it to Darwin and Broome. But Madam Secretary has gone totally screwy! She bought a hair clip in Broome which is essentially a pair of corkscrews, she loves it and keeps telling us what a good buy it was but it seems to rip out … Continue reading Heaven’s, she’s gone screwy

Name it?

Dec 2019, Yea, Vic We stop to buy coffee in Yea, we walk into the empty cafe and place our order. “Name please?” says the barista. It’s really early in the morning, we both look around the empty shop expecting customers to emerge from under tables. OK, he’s a stickler for rules, “Woody”. We wait quietly while he makes our brew then hands us our cups. Both of us are busting to say “Is that for Woody?” but zip our lips till we burst outside laughing. A week later we order another coffee from the same place. The cafe is … Continue reading Name it?

The Noonday Chook

Nov 2019, Lakes Entrance, Vic We just want to buy a chook from the supermarket for lunch but we learnt yesterday that this particular store only puts the chooks in the display warmer on the dot of noon and now the deli section is jam packed with people waiting to grab their chook. By the looks of the milling crowd they’ll be lucky to have any left over to go in the warmer for the latecomers. Perhaps they should fire a noonday cannon like they used to do in Hong Kong. Continue reading The Noonday Chook

When the weather is unbearable

March 2019, Port Albert, Vic Camped in Toora near Victoria’s famous Wilson’s Promontory and with the mercury hovering in the high 30’s we set off for a picnic in the rainforest at Tarra Bulga National Park. Within minutes of hitting the road a friend rang to warn us of bushfires near there. Wilson’s Prom National Park had also been closed due to bushfires… and we’d forgotten our sandwiches. Hot and stuffed and plans astray, we headed for the cool of the coast at historic Port Albert only to be confronted by a bear on a ute who’d obviously had a … Continue reading When the weather is unbearable