This may seem a little obvious but there are subtle differences when making toast on a caravan and if these rules aren’t adhered to, well one may as well eat rice cakes.
When breakfasting on a powered site the first thing the cook must do is remove the smoke alarm and bury it under the doona. No matter how large your caravan is it is still a small box and if a smoke alarm can’t differentiate between a piece of toast and a raging house fire it certainly can’t tell on a caravan. Woody fails this test every morning and wakes the whole park. Add to that his past role as an early rising milkman and you get a bunch of seriously cranky campers. Second step, plug in the toaster and cook your toast. Now that was easy wasn’t it?
When freedom camping unpowered in a delightful bush setting or on a roadside gravel pit things are a tad different. Firstly, remember where you are and don’t stomp about the van declaring loudly that the toaster’s buggered as Woody did a few weeks ago when we were unpowered. Secondly, pop outside and turn on the gas bottle and thirdly, put your toast under the griller. Now did you remove the smoke alarm? Oh shit!!!
For those of you who don’t like to cook in the caravan kitchen that you’ve paid a small fortune for then you can dash outside in the cold and wet and light a fire. Breakfast should be ready by midmorning.
Thank you for those handy hints. I read of a person who got a goose for Christmas and when cooking it they burned down their house. They really cooked their goose. The piece of toast in your picture looks perfect. My toaster cooks things all uneven – black at one end and white at the other. Your posting has inspired me to throw the toaster away.
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Ha, that’s our ‘new’ 4 slot house toaster, already only slots 1 & 4 work! Does goose come with a warning “caution contents may be hot”?
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Brings back memories
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LOL – I remember similar trials when toasting bread on an old blue Primas gas stove in the 70s. Underdone or charcoal setting!
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And those little fly wire toast thingies. I never knew which side to put the toast on.
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Ha ha you’ve got it! Bloody smoke alarms.
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Oh yeah!
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Yes, our dog is TERRIFIED of the smoke alarm and runs and hides behind the dunny in the ensuite. I usually remember to remove the smoke alarm just as the toast starts smoking ,so its a mad scramble onto the bed, over the top of Deb to try to jam the sensor under the pillow before all hell breaks loose!
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Good Lord! Just don’t leave the seat up or the poor dog could end up blue like the one in Meet the Fockers 2!
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That really strikes a chord!
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Ah the simple pleasures of camping.
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Never realised it could be so complicated to make a slice of toast. I’d probably go for option 4 and just butter the bread and eat it raw!
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On reflection I now know why several of our mates have been given the royal order to cook their breakfast outside.
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Love these instructions, laughed and laughed
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